DB'C' Soap Opera
by HoshiDenko
Summary: beware.. things get a little screwy..


Dragon Ball C (for corny) Soap (not the shower kind you sicko!)  
  
Author's note: Please don't hurt me.. It's all innocent fun right? ^_^ The Vegeta/Yamcha scene was prolly the most traumatizing to others *evil laugh*  
  
The scene opened in a peacful, cheery looking town with pearly white buildings gleaming in the sun looking like teeth against the pinkish sunset. A man looked out his window at a passing mother with her chlid. It's his family, and he's happy to see them coming home from their Sunday walk. Everyone in Centerville loved where they were and no one was unhappy. A sudden explosion disturbed the peacefulness and people in the streets ducked behind trash cans, mailboxes, parked cars, anything they could to hide from what they knew would eventually come...  
  
The Androids.  
  
"This sectoins mine! Find your own spot!"  
  
"No fair! You got to pick first last time! You ALWAYS get the tallest bulidings!"  
  
"Too bad! Ladies always go first."  
  
"I don't see any ladies around here!"  
  
"That's harsh, 17."  
  
"So I get the tall buildings this time. Next time we'll flip a car or something."  
  
"Sounds good to me!" The two voices laughed insanely as they began shooting light from their hands, sending every pearly white building to the ground. After leveling the entire city, they simple walked off casually. A large group of men with guns and armor followed behind them.  
  
"Stay where you are!" The two turned around.  
  
"Ugh.. Pesky humans again. I took care fo them last time 18, it's YOUR turn."  
  
"It's your turn to have fun and MY turn to work? 17, you're getting really lazy," she said non-chalantly as she aimed her hand and blasted a small energy blast towards them and finished them off in the expolosion. With a swift move of her head, 18 threw her light blond hair behind her shoulder.  
  
"I need to stop at a mall in the next town. My wardrobe is boring me." 17 looked at her brand new outfit. She donned a black shirt with striped lavender sleeves covered by a jean vest. Lower down was a jean skirt over tight black pants reaching down to her red boots.  
  
"What's wrong with that?"  
  
"These clothes are disgusting me."  
  
"Whatever, at least we don't have to pay." They laughed again and as 18 was taking off, 17 stopped her.  
  
"Uh, sis? Can we walk to the next town?"  
  
"Why? We don't fly because it's fun. We fly because it's faster. Walking would take forever!" she yelled floating back down and landing beside him.  
  
"Well... I need to talk to you...."  
  
"Okay, spill it." she forced as they began walking in the direction of Nikki Town.  
  
"Well... you remember the Z fighters?"  
  
"Yeah, how could I forget them? They were too weak so we left them alone. Why did you do that anyways?"  
  
"Well... that's what I need to talk about... Well," there was a long pause, " you know Trunks? The one with the purple hair?" 17 swallowed noticably.  
  
"Yeah... that little brat trying to defend Vegeta."  
  
"Uh... well... I'm not sure how to say this... but..." 17 hung his head and blushed, fidgeting with the gun on his belt. 18 squinted her eyes at him, trying to figure him out. She suddenly realized..  
  
"NO! 17, DON'T TELL ME THAT... YOU..."  
  
"Yes, I think I have a crush on Mirai Trunks. I would have told you sooner but I wasn't sure how you'd react." 18 was doubled over in a hysterical shock. She was laughing uncontrollably to the point where she was rolling on the ground holding her sides.  
  
"Hey! It's not funny!"  
  
"HA HA HA!! YES IT IS!!! HA HA HA!!" 17 crossed his arms and kept walking.  
  
"I didn't think it was very funny." 18 eventually stopped laughing and caught up to her pouting brother.  
  
"So... you weren't kidding?"  
  
"NO! DID YOU THINK I WAS KIDDING!"  
  
"Sorry..." she said quietly. "So what are you going to do? I mean, he's out to kill you because apparently your future self killed Gohan and almost Trunks. I don't think he's going to be leaping into your arms anytime soon." She picked a rock up from the sidewalk and threw it ahead of her to the point where neither of them could see it.  
  
"I know... but his hair, his eyes, his body..."  
  
"17, you're scaring me."  
  
"I can't help it!!" He ripped off the scarf from around his neck and threw it to the ground. "What can I do to get him?"  
  
"First of all, we need to get you some new clothes."  
  
"What's wrong with these?"  
  
"They're disgusting me."  
  
"Works for me." There was a long silence. 18 kicked a can and it rolled quickly down the hill.  
  
"Now I have something to tell you. Do you remember the short bald guy from the Z team?"  
  
"Yeah. That one you kissed.... 18!!!!" 18 blushed slightly and smiled.  
  
"What? It's just a crush! We can double date, huh?"  
  
"Ha ha.. Shut up and start flying."  
  
~*NIKKI TOWN*~  
  
*Bulma and Trunks are shopping in JCPENNY. There aren't many people at the mall. Bulma is inspecting a tacky little mini skirt while Trunks seems engrossed in the jean rack.*  
  
"Hey Trunks! What do you think of this cute number?" She holds the skirt high enough for her future son to see. He snarls a little showing his disapproval. Bulma makes a gagging motion with her free hand and they both laugh.  
  
"I'm so glad I found a guy to go shopping with," Bulma said as she came up behind Trunks, "Vegeta would NEVER take me to the mall if I threatened him with death." She flung her arms around Trunks from behind and kissed him innocently on the cheek.  
  
"Mom! Not here! I'm your son, remember?" he whispered shrugging her off.  
  
"You're not REALLY my son, you're my future son. But.. when we get home.." she winked an obvious wink at him and he grinned and nodded.  
  
Just about that time, 17 and 18 touched down outside the store. They began filing through racks and shelves of clothes when 17 spotted Trunks in the corner of his eye. He had just come out of the dressing room in the jeans he was trying on. 17 noticed they fit nicely around his butt but made his legs look too stumpy. Trunks frowned at himself in the mirror, then looking past his reflection saw the reflection of one of the last people on Earth he wanted to see: 17.  
  
Trunks whirled around to face the approaching android. He was horror- struck yet confused to see 18 making her way towards Bulma. He would have gone to help the unsuspecting Bulma, but he was cornered. 17 proceeded closer and closer.  
  
"Whats up Trunks?" he greeted him casually.  
  
"What do YOU want?!" Trunks slid into a fighting position, ready to be attacked at any moment.  
  
"Nothing. I was just looking for some clothes when I spotted you, so I thought I'd drop by." he smiled, almost friendly, which caught Trunks off guard. *What is he up to? He's planning something. GRR.. I wish I could see how Bulma is. DAMN! I'm gonna die without having a girlfriend! What a bummer... and in these stupid jeans. What a way to go...*  
  
Now 17 was standing only inches from Trunks. *What is he on??*  
  
"You know, those jeans don't look very good on you. Hold on..." To Trunks' major surprise, 17 left and returned with an alternate pair in a different shade.  
  
"Go ahead... Try them on! I think they'd fit your body type better." *What the hell?? What is this freak trying to pull??* Trunks absentmindedly grabbed the pair from his hands, noticing that upon touching 17's hands, they became sweaty. Trunks jerked his head up to look at 17. He was blushing ever-so-slightly, and he looked away as soon as Trunks made eye contact. Trunks tucked the jeans under his arm and escaped into the nearest dressing room...  
  
::MEANWHILE::  
  
~*THE SON HOUSE*~  
  
*Goku is outside training, while inside Chi Chi is cooking.*  
  
Goku entered the house to see Chi Chi working away at the stove.  
  
"Chi Chi, I'm heading over to Capsule Corp. to spar with Vegeta okay?"  
  
"Okay, honey. Don't kill anyone, don't smash buildings, and be back by dinner!"  
  
"Yeah, whatever." Goku slammed the door behind it, knocking it off it's hinges.  
  
"I think the magic is gone from our relationship... OH WELL! I have better things to do..." Chi Chi picked up the phone and dialed a few numbers. It rang once... twice... and mid-third-ring, a deep, very Jamaican voice asked, "Hello, who is this?"  
  
"Popo, it's me! Goku just left to spar with Vegeta and he won't be back until dinner! And Gohan has been with Videl all day, so the coast is clear! But hurry!"  
  
"Okay, Piccolo's with Dende so I won't have to worry. Bye!" She hung up the phone, turned off the stove and went to change...  
  
"Finally I can get away from her! All day it's just nag nag nag! Man, I wish I had known what marriage was before agreeing to it. But now... onwards to BULMA!" Goku sped up in the direction of Capsule Corp.  
  
::MEANWHILE::  
  
~*AT THE SHRINE*~  
  
"You look very nice today, Piccolo." Dende said sheepishly.  
  
"Yeah, I just got my cape cleaned and added weights to my turban. How'd you notice?"  
  
"Well, you always look good to me. I'm so glad Popo left, because now we're.. alone.."  
  
"Yeah..." Piccolo smiled and evil grin and threw off his armor....  
  
::MEANWHILE::  
  
~*AT CAPSULE CORP*~  
  
*Bulma and Vegeta's room....*  
  
"Yamcha! You're so sexy! Forget about me ever calling you a weakling!"  
  
"It's okay, baby, you know I loved every minute around you."  
  
"Oh you sexy hunk!" Yamcha and Vegeta lunged at each other and locked in a passionate kiss.  
  
"Veggie-boy, when did you say Bulma would be back?" Yamcha said, breaking their kiss.  
  
"She and Trunks went to some big sale so they'll be gone all day. I never knew my future son would be so into shopping. But now I've got my little Yammy Bear!"  
  
Goku landed on the front lawn, straightening his hair with his hand.  
  
"Gotta be cool, Goku. You've known her forever! Just act natural like you're just dropping by to say hi. What if I get nervous? Just keep it cool!" He went straight in without knocking. It was a habit he'd never break. He just felt so comfortable at Capsule Corp.  
  
"I should be living here, not Vegeta! Hmph! That stuck up little brat doesn't deserve this much luxury... WOW! LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT FRIDGE!" Goku looked around to see if anyone was watching and dove at the fridge. He emptied it of all it's contents and was about to enjoy it when he heard banging noises above him.  
  
'Please don't let it be Bulma and Vegeta...' he thought as he raced upstairs. His face turned beat red as he swung the door open to their room and there lay half naked Yamcha and Vegeta...  
  
::MEANWHILE::  
  
~*IN A BAR IN NIKKI TOWN*~  
  
*Lunch and Tien are eating lunch together (no pun intended). The entire restaurant has cleared out their pepper, and wiped down any remainging dust. Lunch has eaten there before.*  
  
'I can't take my mind off of Yamcha! He's so hot, and cool... I wish he was mine..' Lunch couldn't tear Yamcha out of her mind. She couldn't even concentrate on the date she was supposed to be having. When she wasn't thinking about Yamcha, she was staring at Tien's third eye, which almost never blinked.  
  
"Stop staring at me. I know it looks odd but you just have to deal with it!"  
  
"Sorry, but I can't help it." She concentrated on eating. 'I need to find some way to get out of here so I can see Yamcha!' A lightbulb went off in her head so bright it was practically showing through her eyes.  
  
"Dien, I dhink I'm comig down widh somedhig," she tried to fake a stuffy nose, "I dhink I migt sthneeze... AH-AH-AH!" She reared back like she was going to sneeze. Tien threw some money on their table, grabbed her hand and immediately ran outside. Instead she just yawned.  
  
"I think I'd better take you home... I wouldn't want you destroying any cities like last time." Lunch nodded before fake-coughing.  
  
"I think that'd be best, too." They began walking, Lunch "coughing" all the way.  
  
||What's going to happen next?? Is 17 going to confront Trunks about his feelings? What's going on with Chi Chi and Popo? Does Goku have a crush on Bulma? And aren't namekians ASEXUAL?? And what the hell are Vegeta and Yamcha DOING?? Is Yamcha going to break Lunch's heart? And is Lunch going to break Tien's heart? And where is Krillin? Next time... on DRAGON BALL C!!|| 


End file.
